My Monday morning ☀️ newsletter is here to help you 💥 end stress-eating, ditch B.S. diets and stop binge cycles so you can build your strongest, healthiest body and mind yet.
Talking to kids about sugar.
Published 5 months ago • 5 min read
Here’s the thing...
Yes, sugar matters. But...
So does how you talk about it.
As a parent, caregiver or someone in a leadership role (think: coach, teacher, relative or anyone who interacts with kiddos), you hold the power to shape a child’s relationship with food and their bodies for the rest of their lives.
Oof! I know, it’s a huge responsibility.
But it has to be said, that what you say directly affects what children may believe and feel about their body and how they eat and think about food.
The sweet truth about sugar: finding balance
In today’s world, it’s easy to get caught up in extreme opinions about food, especially when it comes to sugar.
But the reality is more nuanced.
The facts are simple: you can enjoy sugary foods and still maintain a healthy lifestyle AND you can also overconsume sugar to the point where it negatively impacts your health.
Both of these statements are true.
This balanced perspective allows us to be both mentally and physically healthy. Instead of demonizing sugar or labeling it as “bad,” we can teach our kids that sugar, like any other food, has its place in a well-rounded diet.
What to Say to Kids About Sugar:
“Sugar is one of the many foods that can be part of our diet. It gives us quick energy AND it’s important to enjoy it in a way that keeps our bodies feeling good.”
“Just like we wouldn’t want to eat only one kind of food all the time, we also want to mix things up and eat different kinds of foods, including fruits, veggies, protein, AND yes, sweets.”
“It’s okay to enjoy a treat! AND we want to eat a variety of foods that help us grow strong and stay healthy.”
Do you notice that you are on one side of the extreme or the other?
The rest of this newsletter is for you.
The dark extreme of demonizing sugar
I took my children to a friend’s birthday party this past weekend, and let’s just say, if you stay awhile versus drop your kid off, you will certainly get a big whiff of diet culture.
I overheard parents and caregivers saying things like:
To a child: “You had enough sugar for the day.”
To another child: “Sugar is not healthy for you.”
About themselves: “I am such a sugar-addict.”
In front of everyone’s children: “that cake, OMG. So much sugar, the kids are going to be wild.”
A parent talking to my own child: “Ask your mommy first before you get another, there is a ton of sugar in that.”
Now by no means am I judging here.
In fact, I know that when parents and caregivers “publicly announce” scary facts about food and health, it’s merely a peek into their own fears.
I also have a great amount of empathy for parents and caregivers since I think they are just trying their best.
And if I were not so immersed in eating behavior research and the world of nutrition, this would have literally been me making those announcements.
Luckily in these tricky moments, I do have the tools to help my own kids gain clarity and I want to share them with you, too.
Instead, I personally teach my kids that they are in charge of their own body’s unique hunger, fullness and pleasure sensors.
You can overhear me saying things like this to my kids:
“I trust you to listen to your body.”
“Enjoy foods that make you feel good, AND, you can always have more later if you’re full now.”
“If you’re ever unsure or need help listening to your body, I’m here for you.”
The dark extreme of glorifying sugar
Just because we don’t want to demonize sugar doesn’t mean I think we should glorify it.
At the end of the day, if you are following the Division of Responsibility in feeding, then you know that you are in charge of the what, when and where of feeding. And your child is responsible for how much and whether or not to eat from the foods you serve.
Eating a large amount of added* sugar is not recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP).
The AAP recommends no more than 6 teaspoons per day (25 grams) of added sugar (source).
*Note the word ADDED, which means any sugar not found naturally in foods. So, this does NOT include sugar found in the form of produce, grains, dairy and beans. If this is still confusing, check out this clear and succinct article by the FDA.
Now, does this mean we need to be militant about getting out our calculator at birthday parties and checking the average amount of added sugar in a slice of cake?
LOL, please do not do that. 🤪
That is, unless your kid has a medical reason, like type 1 or type 2 diabetes, and you need to know their exact sugar intake.
However, if you notice your child mindlessly inhaled a large piece of cake, gulped cups of lemonade, swiped snacks every time they got near the party table and is now getting ready to chow down on the gummy worm goodie bag favors, you might want to step in without food-shaming.
You can say things like:
“Hey love, I see you’ve enjoyed a lot of the yummy party food. Let’s save some for later so you can enjoy it again.”
“You’ve tried so many delicious things! Let’s save the rest for another time and see what else we can do at the party.”
“I’m glad you’re enjoying the snacks. Let’s pause and check in with your tummy to see how it’s feeling.”
“We have dinner in an hour. Would you like me to wrap that cookie for your lunch box tomorrow?”
Point being, you are the leader, and you can help your child - it does not need to be an “all hands off” or “all hands on” approach.
What is your “dessert threshold”?
Do you tend to “freak out prematurely” when your kid had a piece of cake and is now going for a cookie?
Generally speaking, I tend to think one dessert per day (even two) is not something to be worried about in the context of a balanced pattern of eating. Especially for kiddos playing sports who need quick energy and recovery.
But sometimes we need to figure out if “the problem” is their eating behavior OR if “the problem” is how you are responding to their eating behavior.
This takes a bit of awareness, to start. ➡️ Do you notice you tend to demonize certain foods? ➡️ Do you put a lot of emphasis on weight and body size in your home? ➡️ Do you talk about sugar, calories, fat, carbs, protein, etc. when trying to “teach” your kids about food? The good news is that it’s never too late to change. 💪
If you are curious about more personalized guidance, I would love to chat further - feel free to book a 1:1 nutrition coaching call.
P.S. I was just recommended a book by Dr. Charlotte Markey’s book entitled, “Adultish the Body Image Book for Life” and wanted to share! If anyone wants to read with me and chat about it in a VERY CASUAL book club, feel free to reply :)
REVV Health is in-network with Premera Blue Cross and Regence. For other insurances, we provide superbills.
Personalized Nutrition Therapy: I specialize in tailored nutrition counseling, steering away from fad diets and focusing on sustainable lifestyle changes that align with your values.
Family & Pediatric Nutrition: I help empower kids and families to build positive eating habits and overcome disordered eating patterns.
Corporate Wellness: I elevate your team’s health and productivity through engaging talks and programs fostering a healthier relationship with food and wellness.
Marissa Beck, MS, RDN
Founder of REVV Health, is a registered dietitian nutritionist (RDN) with over 14 years of experience in corporate health & wellness. She offers private and family nutrition therapy & workplace solutions to help people REVVamp their eating habits. Marissa’s expertise includes building nutrition programs for tech companies and counseling people with diverse medical conditions. Currently Marissa is the president elect of the Washington State Academy of Nutrition & Dietetics (WSAND) and is pursuing a board certification as an eating disorder specialist. A native New Yorker, she graduated with a Master of Science from Columbia University and enjoys an active lifestyle in Greater Seattle with her husband and two girls.
Recover FULLY from disordered eating, ED + weight obsession
My Monday morning ☀️ newsletter is here to help you 💥 end stress-eating, ditch B.S. diets and stop binge cycles so you can build your strongest, healthiest body and mind yet.